Creeper Pig

Nugget is a creeper pig. Case in point: This past Saturday morning I went outside to see what the little piggle was up to. I looked to the left towards the deck – no Nugget to be found. I look to the right towards the lawn, and this is what I see:

Creeper pig.

We must have stared at each other for five minutes, and who knows how long she was staring at me before I saw her. She didn’t flinch the whole time, even when I moved to take the picture.

Pigs have a great sense of smell and hearing, but eyesight unfortunately isn’t a strength, so I’m fairly certain that the whole time she stared me down, she was wondering who/what I was. The moment I said her name though, she came running (I want to say this was because she loves me, but I’m pretty sure it was because she thought I had food). This isn’t this first time she has creeped, and it certainly won’t be the last. She’ll be a creeper pig until the end. 🙂

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Full Frontal Nuggage

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Sorry I’ve been gone for so long – things have definitely been busy. Went to Mexico, lots of holidays and birthdays, my good friend got married, it’s concert season, etc. Of course, I have also devoted a lot of time to my porker, the Nuggster. We have massive couch cuddles pretty much every day, as well as the occasional hissy fit. Okay okay, daily hissy fits. I’ll break her of her bad habits some day… My boyfriend sent me this picture of Nugget today – he takes a lot of them when he hangs out with her in the morning. Now he only needs to send me them! I present to you . . . FULL FRONTAL NUGGAGE! (By the way, the title of his email was “Ew,” and I think I’ll have to agree with him a little on this one. I assure you all though, in most pics, my Nugg is adorbs.)

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Mojo in a Basket with Fruit

Okay, okay, I know. This title is weird. And exciting. And mysterious, provocative, unsettling, squirmy (When I think of unsettling, I think of squirmy. Deal with it). Unfortunately for all you sick-minded peoples out there, this title is a little misleading. For, you see, I am not referring to the mojo you might have heard of in the Austin Powers trilogy, that sex appeal we all desire. I’m referring to its namesake, my old cat Mojo. The two aren’t unalike – Mojo had a lot of mojo in her day, and can still win over whoever she meets with her wiley charms. Anyways, I loved this picture of me and her and thought it would make a good short post, if only for the interesting title.

 

 

 

Jelly Donut Nugget

I think Nugget is a lot smarter than she looks/acts (pigs are actually the third most intelligent animal on the planet, or something like that). Or she made a big mistake and made the best out of a crummy situation. I’ll let you decide.

Last month, I walked into the garage, aka Nugget’s room, probably to give her a carrot or let her in the house, and, upon glancing over towards her bed area, noticed her big pillow was looking a little larger than usual. She sleeps on one of those huge dog pillows, and earlier in the month she ripped a huge hole in the cover and inner pillow. This was probably in a fit of rage – I started a new job a few months ago that requires a one hour commute each way, which really extends my work day; needless to say, we had to slowly grow into our new schedule. Anyways, I guess Nugget was cold and decided that nesting inside of the pillow was the best solution. Imagine my surprise when her pillow started moving after I called her name and she popped out of the hole! I almost died of laughter, and so did everyone else who witness this phenomenon. I thought the Nugget-stuffed pillow looked exactly like a jelly donut, hence the name. (FYI, I know the garage looks super dirty, but I promise I cleaned it recently. The Nuggster likes to rip stuff up.)

I think you can see why I have a dilemma about whether this was her purposeful doing, or making the best out of a bad situation she had created. I let her have her fun for a week or so, and even restuffed her pillow to the best of my ability so she could continue sleeping in there. Unfortunately, the stuffing got all over the place and I pretty much had to throw the whole thing away. Now she’s sleeping on chair pads and her heating pad. Guess it’s time to go buy her a new piggie bed! Hopefully this next one can withstand her destructive behaviors. 🙂

Hot Dog Trees

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I’ve written about this before in an older blog, and thought I’d revisit it here. This story goes back to my whimsical childhood and is a tale about how I was maybe a little more off the mark than some kids, or not. You be the judge. Anyways, most children plant various objects they would like to see grow on a tree. I’m assuming they mostly planted things that would be useful or from which they would derive the most pleasure – money, candy, certain toys, etc. Well, I planted hot dogs. Because I wanted a hot dog tree. And I did go back to the spot where I planted these cylindrical meat sticks in order to see whether my tree was growing or not (it wasn’t). If indeed it did grow, I think it would’ve looked a lot like this:

Okay, maybe not in the desert, and probably with more hot dogs and leaves, but you get the point.

Nowadays, I’m not as into hot dogs – guess it wasn’t one of those foods that stuck (other edibles that didn’t stick: Lucky Charms marshmallows, uncooked corn tortillas with peanut butter and sprinkles, uncooked oatmeal, Bonne Bell peppermint flavored chapstick, cream of coconut . . . ).

If I did still eat hot dogs as regularly as I’m assuming I did back then, I would definitely need this Barking Dog thing to cook them in.

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Actually, I probably need this just in case, you know, someone comes over and wants a hot dog or chili dog or something. Or in case I want one. Is it wrong to wish they had this in pig form, and it would oink when the hot dogs were ready? Or the sausage? Anyways, that’s my story. Feel free to comment with your weird childhood fascinations. ❤

Welcome to the world of Lauren and Nugget and everyone else

This isn’t the first time I’ve tried to write/keep up with a blog. I’m pretty sure I had one way back in high school. I started one when I was traveling in Europe a few years ago – I think my last post was about drunk naked Scottish-men (don’t worry, it was very PG on my end). I have written in numerous journals throughout various points in my life, and have kept only one of them for the sheer fact that it’s hilarious (all the others were so embarrassing that it would have been a liability on my post pre-teen life to hold onto them). Anyways, the fact is, I haven’t been very good at keeping up with this sort of thing in the past. But I promise to do my best here!

The thing is, I’ve come to realize that my life is, overall, kinda interesting. My family is such a hodge-podge of interesting characters (think East Coast meets West Coast meets the South meets Mexico), my friends are completely uninhibited (at least around me, and I will definitely take advantage of them here – maybe I’ll use code names like I did in that journal I kept…), my boyfriend is this rare combination of creative genius and 5-year-old potty humor expert, and on a whole I’m pretty weird myself. Who wouldn’t want to read about all the exciting things that happen to me and the people around me? Oh, and I guess I forgot to mention this, but I do have a pet pig, Nugget, who colors my life (and everyone else’s for that matter) in so many, many, many, manymanymany ways. What color, you might ask? You’ll have to read to find out.  🙂

I have stuff planned to write about. I have pictures, I have stories, I have memories. I have a vision for my blog – I’m past the first hurdle of actually creating it. Now I just have to keep pushing this rock until it starts rolling. Stay tuned!